Repetitive Strain Injury (RSI) Awareness Day is February 29th

Building Better Relationships at Work

The workplace is complex, we’re often required to adjust the way we communicate and interact with people, which can be a challenging task. Therefore, it’s not surprising that we are sometimes misunderstood, or we inadvertently step on a few toes along the way.

So why are we caught off guard when we discover that we’ve offended someone or overstepped our boundaries? Probably because practising effective communication requires a lot of exactly that—practise. Consider the following advice when you want to improve your relationships at work or avoid unnecessary conflict:

• Keep in mind that we all have pressures that we are under.  Each of us is under stress for various reason which can impact how people respond or react.
• Think about the way you phrase a question or an answer before you communicate it. Ask yourself if it’s respectful, if the timing is right, or if what you want to share will add value to the conversation.
• Talking to someone face to face is almost always more effective than sending a text or email. Whether face-to-face or via video chat if working remotely, speaking to the person is most effective, especially if you’re confronted with a potentially challenging situation.
• Realize that most people don’t like to be told that they’re wrong. Find a way to make some positive as well as negative points, or to phrase your comments in a way that “saves face” for your colleague.
• Don’t feed a co-worker’s anger. Give yourself a day to think about it and step back from the problem to gain some objectivity.
• Demonstrate that you’re flexible. Communicate that you’ll be supportive no matter what decision is reached.

If a co-worker conflict continues:

If conflict persists after all avenues have been exhausted, particularly where harassment or discrimination is concerned, it may be necessary to involve your manager or HR.

If there’s no end in sight and you’re becoming over-anxious, reluctant to go to work—or even fearful for your job—contact a professional counsellor for additional support and advice on how to effectively deal with conflict.

Coping with Holiday Stress

Preparing for and celebrating the holidays can come with increased demands on our time and activity. We feel stressed when we cannot meet the demand. One of the common ways that coping may fall short has to do with expectations. Another has to do with the kinds of strategies we use to cope when under stress. When expectations are not realistic, stress is often the result.

When expectations are too high, when they are not met or when things happen that we cannot control (for example, we cannot control how well others get along with each other), stress is the likely result. We may have a picture in our minds of what a holiday is supposed to be like and then go about trying to make it so. The good news is that it is possible to manage stress well.

Review your expectations for the holidays. Whose expectations, are they? Are they yours or someone else’s? Finally, are your expectations based on what is possible or only on what you hope will happen but never have? The best predictor of future behaviour is past behaviour.

Pace yourself. Take on what you can manage. Spending more than you can afford, baking more than you think you have time for, or inviting more people to a family dinner than you think you can accommodate is likely to lead to stress and frustration. Do the best you can within your means and limits.

Review your coping strategies. You may well feel stressed at times during a special event. Plan how you will cope if that happens. Try to choose coping strategies that leave you feeling good in the short term and the long term. Time out for physical or relaxation exercises, a walk, or hobbies can be great ways of coping with stress and are good lifestyle practices in general.

Focus on what really matters. People whose holiday experiences focus on relationships and activities with others report more happiness than those for whom gift-giving is a big focus]. Think about what is more important–the perfect purchase, a turkey cooked on time or enjoying an activity with friends and family.

If despite your best efforts, you feel overwhelmed with feelings of anxiety or sadness, consider professional help. When stress leads to distress like anxiety or depression that are persistent and get in the way of accomplishing your usual activities, it can be a good idea to contact a general health care provider or one who specializes in mental health problems.

Articles

CAMH – Holiday Stress

Reducung Holiday Stress – Alberta Health

Resources – Telus Health